This is the best thing that has ever happened to me?

Before I offend anyone. My Children, Wife and family are very special to me and I am not saying in any way that my tumor is better than you or the events that brought us together. However, this is the best thing that could have ever happened to me. I have learned so many things in the past 2 months. The lessons have changed my life more than any of the fantastic books I have read, any work lesson or anything else.

My early lessons from Jeff Morgan, Tony Humphrey, Peter Kehayes and my Mother have led me down a path of development that has become routine. They all in their own ways taught me to invest in myself and give it to others. Share Knowledge. My mother taught me the invaluable lessons of how to treat and not judge others. People are the most valuable asset in our lives. Surround ourselves with people who are smarter than ourselves. The lessons go on and on and I think about these people everyday.

I am a cynic and can be sarcastic but have always tried to help the people I work with to get better. Teresa will tell you that I just want to feel loved. I think it is something that I have always wanted to feel. I am never satisfied with the amount of love that I feel.

Going through this experience has shown me just how much I am loved and how people really can be. The e-mails and calls...the encouragement from everywhere...financial support...I am really over whelmed with the love and energy that has been given to me and my family. It is unbelievable and has affected me in every way. I will approach my days with a different level of appreciation for the people in my life and will try to make a dent in repaying the lessons I have learned from this to all who I can impact. There is no way I can show how thankful I am and love you all back. I am so Lucky to be involved and linked to the people in my life and unfortunatly I may not of realized it had I not had this tumor.

Down the home stretch

I had no idea that when I went to bed last night that today would be an emotional day. However, when I woke up at 5am...I realized that in a week I am going to have brain surgery. I teared up in the shower and when I pulled into work at 6:15. I really had no idea that this could be a tough week. Lyn gave me a card that said she thought I was brave with a rock that said Bravery. I guess I am brave in that I have been able to work, smile, be a Dad and live like little is wrong...while I have an egg pressing on my brain stem. I look back at the past month and can't believe I am in the home stretch.

I have been wanting to write about all of the wonderful things I have learned from this tumor. It sounds like sarcasm but I really do think it is one of the best things that has ever happened to me...I will explain it tomorrow because I want to look back in a month and see if I have changed my mind.

Thanks Susan

Yesterday my head was killing me and Susan offered to work this Saturday for me. I am thankful that she offered as I felt horrible today. These headaches are getting old. I only have 4 more days of work before I am off. I am getting excited to see Timora and Ken in Memphis. This will be the 2nd time I have ever watched the Superbowl with Ken. The last time was 9 years ago. It was Superbowl XXXII between the Broncos and Packers. We had spent the day skiing on Mt Bachelor and went to a hole in the wall place that had an all you can eat spaghetti feast at half time (food came out at the 3rd quarter). It was an epic game...when John Elway got hit and did a helicopter into the end zone. Cathy was new to the family and had been enjoying a little of the northwest fermented juices and when we were driving home she kept saying she was hot. She took of layers till...well lets just say it was a memorable Superbowl that I will never forget.

My eye hurts

Today I have a serious headache. I am really enjoying American Idol. Wednesday I watched New York and had a rough time coming up with an accurate ranking due to falling asleep a couple of time during the show and I didn't record it.

I am done with all pre-doctor work...No more paperwork. No more giving blood. I have been cleared so the next stop is Memphis a week from Sunday. My doctors appointment went well yesterday...The doctor was kinda funny when addressing my high blood pressure (135/91) and cholesterol (225). He said "Don't worry about it you have much bigger issues to worry about". Lets take care of things in order and I guess the next stop is brain surgery.

In Atlanta I saw the best documentary that addressed racism and children. It was shot in 1970 and I would recommend seeing it. You can watch it at: http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/pages/frontline/shows/divided/etc/view.html

I am sorry I didn't tell you about it 36 years ago I just saw it.

Have a great weekend.

I am going to be in big trouble today

I sat in my room on my computer and listening to my zune wide awake until 2:45am. I couldn't sleep or get comfortable. My class needs to be exciting or I am going to be very tired with my 3 hours of sleep. Today's theme is Coffee, Coffee and maybe mix in a Dew if I have to.

I may need to go see Juan Valdez this morning on my may to "Spirit of Diversity" class.

That's it Memphis?

I am in Atlanta again at a horrible hotel. I have a twin bed that takes up most of the room. Lyn and I went out to dinner and I am still full and we ate 4 hours ago. We watched American Idol and I was a little disappointed in Memphis...I thought there might be a few more disasters and a few more gems...My top 4 is:

1. Mr Head...looked like a fat devil.

2. The girl singing Aretha

3. Fidel Castro...

4. Blondie from Colliersville

Overall I think it is a good season so far. This morning Teresa got up with me at 6am after being up since 3:30 with Preston...We drank coffee and had a great chat for an hour and nine minutes while my car warmed up.

The surgery is coming fast all of a sudden. It was felt slow as molasses until this week. It is less than two weeks away. I have one more doctors appointment on Thursday and I give blood on Friday and I am officially ready. Lets get it done!!!

Timora the explora

Saturday we took Anthony and Preston to meet up with some friends that were bowling. There were lots of kids and the excitement of the bowling center. Anthony started out a little shy wanting to cling to Teresa or I for about 15 minutes...and then he was all in to it. He got to roll a couple of balls...with some help. Anna (4) and Tori (3) were standing with him talking "hi baby" and he tried to kiss Tori on her lips. They ran away. I am a Dad. A bonifide, for real, 100% Dad. I am so excited about the future of games, choir or D&D club...I really don't care I just love to see those boys happy. I am sure Teresa feels the same and the adventure together is special and I am going to enjoy it while it is happening.

Every morning at 8am Teresa and Anthony have been watching Dora and to watch Teresa yelling at Swiper or singing the map song is great. Anthony is getting into it almost as much as his Mom.

Every time I see Dora I think about Bowling with Brian and every week he would compare Timora to Dora. I really don't see the similarities...Dora doesn't drink coffee, she is tat less, she walks everywhere and this morning she was talking to frogs. However, I still think about my sister when I see Dora.

Enjoy your holiday...Championship Sunday!!!

I am the Big Tipper

Today I had my pre-op certification physical. My Doctor was extremely over excited and careful on his notes and testing. I am talking:

• Blood Pressure 3 times (twice in the left arm and once in the right) FYI 135 over 82...best in 6 months!!!!


• Chest X-ray


• EKG


• Listen to my breathing from every angle


• and so on

I was at the doctor for 3 hours and I go back in the morning for labs and have another appointment to talk about my labs next week. No joke...he gave me 5 cards and asked me to give one to everyone who works on me and wants to make sure he gets detailed notes on the surgery and how I do. He is an experienced doctor??? I am okay with all the detail everyone is taking with me...However, where was the detail when I went to the doctor 6 years ago for headaches or asked 2 doctors about my jaw or the cramping in my face? I am really not bitter or even think the tumor would have been found earlier...It is like a server changing their service level because they have a big tipper...OOOOO big tipper is here I better put my game face on and get my crumb scrapper out of the car. I feel like the big tipper.

Bowling season is over

Last night I finished my league for the year. I had quite a tumble the last 10 weeks. My average dropped 5 pins in 10 weeks...221 to 216. I stunk. It was a sad feeling leaving and I was a little emotional walking to the car. Everyone was so nice and showed genuine concern as I was leaving.

I gave blood on Tuesday for my surgery...I will give again the end of next week. I will have a litter of Tony Blood shipped to Memphis per Dr Robertson.

Okay...American Idol made Seattle look like a bunch jokes. If I hadn't spent some time in the Emerald City I might think Yikes???? I can assure you they will make Memphis look great...there is a lot of music history and good singers...(Bible Belt...church singers). Next week millions of people will be saying "I really would like to go to Memphis"...sorry Seattle.

Last night I can only give a top 3:

1. Portland dude with the Fro...really Troutdale


2. Sixteen year old Jazzy with the strong voice


3. Lisa Leslie...Only 3% of the general population will get it but its funny.

I am off to work and get my pre-op release physical. Wish me luck.

Season 6 begins

I have never been shy about my passion for American Idol. This year I am
planning on Teresa and I having a little finale party. Last night did not disappoint me as I shed my first tear at the 6th minute of the show when the girl wanted to inspire people like Jewel. My top 5 from day one:

1. Somewhere over the rainbow girl.
2. Crack baby.
3. Colombian girl doing Blondie
4. pimple boy with the scraped up nose
5. Army Girl

Tonight is day 2. I can't wait for tonight. Can I get a TV into the ICU?

When I got home last night it took 30 seconds for Anthony to tell me MORE CANDY ten times and he just told me again. Why couldn't Mom have taught him more carrots?

Have a great day...

Mom leaves in the morning

Mom just went to bed...She has had her final goodbyes to the babies. In less than 24 hours I will be turning Mom loose into the big bad world. It has been good having Mom here. I thought it might be years before anyone other than Ken in my family would be in Soddy-Daisy. I am so relieved that Mom was able to see Anthony and Preston at their home. Mom taught Anthony several "tricks":

• So handsome and so strong


• several sign words (more, love and candy)


• played a lot of basketball and other games

In mom's visit had several highlights:

• Made two dinners (pot roast and pot roast)


• bought two five pound bags of sugar


• Knitted three hats


• made 3 batches of peanut butter fudge


• two batches of no bakes

Overall it was a good time. I am sure Mom is ready to have her own space back...Uncle Dan has a saying "Company is like fish, no matter how much you love it after a while it starts to stink" I love my Mom but I miss walking around the house naked.

Ken and Cathy

Congrats to Ken and Cathy they are having a baby. This is the most excited I have ever been for another child to come into our family (that wasn't named Anthony or Preston). They told us with a video of the Pregnancy test...good idea, however a little graphic.

Mom and I are headed to Huntsville, AL for a bowling tourney. Wish us luck.

Last night Teresa and I got to go to dinner with Lyn, Casey, Brandon and Kelly... We had a great time but Teresa must have thought she was in college...When we got home she got a little sick...a lot sick and I don't think it was the Japanese food. During the night she kept saying "I am having such a good time" it made me think of Timora.

7 more games

Here it is 8 teams and 7 more games...I am usually pretty reflective at this time of year...I am wrapped up in the end of the NFL...I, like many of my friends have a little let down at the end of the superbowl. This year the day after the superbowl...I check into the hospital for brain surgery. It is really ironic...probably more to me than anyone else.

Home from the ATL

Peace up, A-town down. It is a saying that you would only get if spent some time in the dirty, dirty...South that is. We had a fun car road home although I think we might have teased JD a little much...He was trying to imitate the Bulls announcer from the 90's and when he said Michael Jordan his voice would crack like a girl so we made a little fun.

In doing some Brain research it turns out that I found a MRI of Homer Simpson's Brain.

We made it home just in time for bowling. I was fair...I was actually fine until the third game 237 and 217 until Gary and I started quizzing each other on Seinfeld trivia. I threw some bad shots trying to think of questions and answers during my back swing. 198 for 652.

I came home to the quietest home ever...Anthony and Preston asleep, Mom doing a crossword puzzle and Teresa finishing her James Frye Novel. I played a game of Quidler with Mom (lost for the 4th time in a row), ate a bowl of Lucky Charms and lights out in the next few minutes.

Today I got a nice Prayer card signed by some friends of my Mother in Law. Very thoughtful from some people I have never met.

It is just a phase

About 10 years ago before I was completly loyal to the Barenaked Ladies...I was in this Jill Sobule and Poe phase. Well with my zune and an unlimited collection of music I am going through this wierd Regina Spektor phase...I am not trying to sell Regina I have just been enjoying her music.

I am still in Atlanta and just to vent for one second...There are 150 people at my meeting the meeting has to be in the 100K range for the two days with travel, meals and room space. Our company sent out an extensive wookbook of homework. It was an 18 page set of instructions to prepare you for the classes. When we get to the breakout rooms it turns out we are the only ones to complete the homework...am I nieve or is this the norm? The class moved at breakneck pace and would have been simple if the participants did the pre-work.

I worked out this morning. It was only a good workout because I got out of bed and went down and did it. Otherwise it kinda stunk. I really wasn't in the mood...I did 20 minutes on the treadmill.

Last night at dinner Jonathan was talking trash about his athletic prowless. We decided to have a race in the parking lot...50 yard race and I won by 20 yards...I was laughing thinking about the time Ken and I were racing in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant in Portland. Ken was in pretty good shape and was weighing in the 250 range. I barely had an edge and with Cathy at the finish line Ken took a headfirst diver skinning up his hands.

I am off to the meetings...6 days to American Idol...set your TIVO.

On the road...

I remember when I was 21 years old working for Red Robin and I used to get so excited to go on a road trip. I couldn't understand people complaining about having to put up with the traffic or being away from home. I used to think and sometimes I still do think it is so nice to get away and do something different.

In the morning I am heading to Atlanta to go to a training class. I am excited about the class and I like the Hotel I am staying at...but I am just not that excited about being away from the family right now.

Today I was in one of the funniest interviews I have had in a long time. At Sodexho we are required to ask the same questions of all of the candidates. So before we hire a management position I craft the questions that we are going to ask. Today, Jonathan and I were interviewing a candidate with a corrections background and they never broke character. The character of if you ask me another one of those Tony Klein questions I am going to stab you. About half way through the interview I asked the question "What does diversity mean to you in the workplace?" and with a stoic glare they said "There is another one of those big words" Huff "I have been up since three". I wanted to bust at the gut...I have never been happier about having a headache.

I have to go eat the rest of the brownies...Teresa fell asleep.

My house is falling apart

Last night a portion of my face went numb. I wasn't too scared as I was warned by the wizard as he was kinda surprised that it wasn't numb already. It felt like when you cross your eyes for too long you get that feeling on the bridge of your nose but on my face. Teresa rubbed my face until I fell asleep. I woke up with a hang over type headache.

Teresa is having pain in her lower right abdomen that was keeping her up. We are waiting for her doctor to call back before we go to the ER.

It is a sad day when the healthiest person in our house is Mom?????

Present day Dr Robertson

Here is a present day picture of Dr Robertson. I will be getting some signed copies to sell on ebay...for the neurogeeks.

Now or Later

It feels like I have known about my tumor for a year. It is amazing to think I have only known since November 28th. Time is not flying. I would really like to get this over with...there are so many things I want to get started on:

• I want to lose my extra lbs.


• I want to do a better job of communicating with my family.


• I want to appreciate each day and approach each day with a mission.

I don't really stink at these things but I want to be a much better leader and I am going to put the work in.

At this point every person I know is aware that I have a brain tumor. From time to time I run into or speak with a friend who doesn't know. It is not a comfortable conversation.

"What are you doing for the Super Bowl?"

"I am getting brain surgery"

Anyway you slice it...it is shocking when you have to tell someone even though the shock for me is over and I am in reality. Speaking of reality...American Idol starts in 9 days.

11 more games

It is always sad when we are down to the last 11 NFL games of the year. The tough thing is trying to work out trying to watch the games. You can't or I should say I can't hang out for 16 hours each weekend watching football. I have babies and a wife, I have a job and responsibilities. I am also not in a football crazy relationship where there is any importance of watching football. I have made it an art form to catch most of the playoffs each weekend usually in 4 hours vs 16. You have to learn what to miss and realize that it is okay to miss an occasional kickoff or the ending of a blowout. I have learned to ration...and sometimes I catch a little extra.

Bring your Mother to work day

Today I took my Mom to work. Lyn made my Mom cry twice. I knew there was a chance so I warned her that Lyn was working on some things and I didn't want her to be alarmed at the ribbons. Lyn made these ribbons that are blue polka-dots and have a heart with TK 300 on it. I was surprised today by all the ribbons and the flyer's for Ton-a-thon (a bowling event that Lyn is putting together with a little help from her friends). Teresa and I are a humbled by the kindness and generosity of people. I am shocked!!! I have no idea how I am going to thank everyone.

Mom and I spent the first hour touring all of the areas. She met a bunch of people and we made it to my office. I had a meeting at 9:15 and 10 so I dropped her with the computer and we met for lunch at noon. After lunch I left her again and came back to her at 4pm and I wrapped up my day. So needless to say take your mother to work day was a big success:

• 7 hugs for Mom
• 17 games of hearts
• 2 Starbucks
• Free lunch with Tony (Chick-fil-A)

I hope everyone Else's take your mother to work day went well.

February 6th

Well we are back from Memphis. Wow!!! Dr Robertson was amazing. It was so comforting to be with someone who can actually do the surgery. He spent 3 hours with Teresa and I going over the anatomy of the base skull, looking at our MRI results, and explaining what his approach will be. I was actually thinking I could do the surgery myself if I wasn't sleeping.

Don't get me wrong it is still brain surgery and he is the best brain surgeon in the world...but it was a big relief. We were at his office for 6 hours going over every detail from how I would be wearing panty hose to prevent blood clots to how they would keep Teresa informed with phone calls every hour to the visiting hours in ICU.

Dr Robertson was confident and humble. He used regular language included a couple of profanities in describing some of the practices of "regular brain surgeons". He told us that residents would be there but they won't touch a thing..."this is my surgery" he said. He also said if I had the wrong team they could really jack me up. I also may not need radiation depending on the success. He did guarantee me the biggest headache imaginable.

The cut will be from between my ear and jawbone to the top of my head. I should be able to recover in 8-10 weeks at the most. The best news is that I am going to live.

Our surgery will be on February 6th at 7:30 AM. Out with the Egg!!!

Were off to see the Wizard

I am the Scarecrow and Teresa is Dorothy. Dr Robertson he is the Wizard.

I have a lot of emotion from excitement to fear. I know it is only a consultation and I am prepared for the wizard to be like other wizard's with their wizard attitude. I am excited to get some answers...Like when and how.

I will make some calls on the way home from Memphis. I will give a detailed explaination of what will be happening here on Wednesday Morning.

Teresa and I am so thankful of all of the support and kindness from everyone. I am so lucky to have so many caring people in my life. THANKS.